Paul does not soften his past. He looks at it squarely and names it for what it was. He persecuted the church. He stood by while believers were killed. He did everything in his power to stamp out the name of Jesus. And then he says something that should stop us in our tracks. He calls himself the worst of sinners — not as a performance of humility, but as a statement of fact. This is not false modesty. Paul knew exactly what he had been. And he wanted the whole world to know it too, because the worse his past, the more clearly it displayed what grace is capable of.
That is the point. Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, and Paul holds himself up as Exhibit A. Not to draw attention to himself, but to make an argument on behalf of everyone who has ever wondered whether they have gone too far. Whether the things they have done, the years they have wasted, the ways they have failed have finally exhausted the patience of God. Paul’s answer is no. The immense patience Jesus showed him was not an exception to the rule. It was a demonstration of it. It was written down and preserved so that you, reading this today, would have evidence. If grace could reach Paul, it can reach you.
“You are good and all-powerful, caring for each one of us as though the only one in your care.”¹ — Augustine of Hippo, Confessions
Augustine wrote those words after years of running from the very God who was pursuing him. He knew what it meant to be found by a love that does not grow tired. And that is the love Paul is describing here. Not a distant benevolence, but a specific, patient, pursuing grace directed at you. Whatever you have done. Whatever you have been. His patience has not run out on you. So don’t stop believing. Don’t stop holding on. And don’t give up on the people around you either. If God could reach Paul, He can reach anyone. When that truth settles in, you will understand why Paul could not help but break into praise. To the King eternal, immortal, invisible — who saves the worst and calls them His own.
Reflection:
- In what ways have you personally experienced the immense patience of Jesus in your own life?
- Is there something in your past you have struggled to believe grace could cover? How does Paul’s story speak to that?
- Is there someone in your life who seems too far gone for God’s grace? How does Paul’s testimony encourage you to keep praying for them?
Prayer: Thank God for the mercy and patience He has shown you personally. Ask Him to help you receive that grace fully, not just believe it in theory. Pray that the reality of His pursuing love would move you to praise.
Footnote: ¹ Augustine of Hippo, Confessions, trans. Henry Chadwick (Oxford: Oxford University Press, 2009), Book III, Chapter 11.